Some persons are followers of the Atlanta Falcons. However many, many extra persons are NOT followers of the Atlanta Falcons. This 2026 Defector NFL workforce preview is for these within the latter group. Learn all of the previews to date right here.
Your workforce: Atlanta Falcons.
Your 2025 file: 8-9, which is much less of a win-loss file than it’s a manifestation of the spirit of mediocrity that inhabits this franchise. It has been nearly 10 years since 28-3 occurred, and the Falcons have gone a mixed 65-84 with one playoff look since. This workforce’s by no means ok to care about or dangerous sufficient to pity, and due to this fact it’s one thing a lot worse: a workforce that may as properly not even exist.
Even when the Falcons attempt to shake issues up, they can not emerge from the haze that stops the remainder of us from having to acknowledge them. After three straight 7-10 seasons, Atlanta signed Kirk Cousins in free company within the 2024 offseason and drafted Michael Penix Jr. within the first spherical of that 12 months’s draft. Oooohhh, quarterback controversy. That is thrilling, proper? Not when it includes these two drips. Cousins bought the beginning gig in 2024 and principally performed like shit for 14 video games earlier than getting benched for Penix, and the Falcons completed 8-9. The 2025 season was the identical factor in reverse: Penix bought the beginning job out of camp and principally performed like shit for 9 video games earlier than tearing his ACL, then Cousins mopped up the remainder of the season. One other 8-9 file. Rinse, lather, repeat.
At the least Cousins is gone now. Your face goes to seem like you simply stepped in cat puke while you discover out who they changed him with.
Your coach: Kevin Stefanski, who actually does not get sufficient credit score for being one of many extra despicable figures within the NFL. He is coming to Atlanta after spending six seasons as head coach of the Browns, the place he received Coach of the 12 months twice and was typically held up as a tragic determine caught up within the ongoing desecration of that workforce.
The unhappy story goes that Stefanski was on the verge of fixing the tradition in Cleveland, whereas constructing a younger and thrilling workforce, when his personal entrance workplace undermined the mission by buying and selling for world-historic creep Deshaun Watson after which handing him a franchise-breaking assured contract. On this model of occasions, Stefanski is only a fall man who spent the previous couple of seasons doing the very best he might underneath the team-building restrictions his entrance workplace placed on him, and we should always see his 45-56 file as inspiring quite than pathetic.
That is the story Steanski would love so that you can consider, which is why the day earlier than the Browns fired him this previous offseason, he or somebody in his camp satisfied honeybaked NFL insider Pete Prisco to go on the market and demand that Stefanski was by no means on board with the Watson commerce. Wow, while you actually give it some thought, Stefanski is simply as a lot a sufferer as Watson’s precise victims!
In fact that is all bullshit. Stefanski was on that dais with Andrew Berry and Dee Haslam defending the Watson commerce when it occurred, and he could not wait to promote Baker Mayfield down the river in an effort to hand his offense over to the third Tate brother. Keep in mind this ESPN story from 2023, through which it is revealed that Stefanski was a part of the recruiting workforce that met with Watson in his lawyer’s workplace in 2022 and offered him on the concept of changing into the Browns’ subsequent quarterback?
Whereas the Haslams spoke to Watson’s legal professionals in an workplace, Stefanski talked soccer with Watson within the convention room. The 2 hit it off instantly watching movie clips collectively. Watson in the end selected the Browns. Cleveland despatched the Texans three first-round picks to finish the commerce and signed Watson to a five-year deal value a file $230 million totally assured. The blockbuster transfer, in some ways, tied Watson’s destiny to Stefanski; and, in each approach, tethered Stefanski’s to Watson.
Observe: In the event you ever end up attempting to persuade a soccer participant to hitch your workforce whereas sitting in a convention room in his legal professional’s workplace, you might be positively making a foul life determination.
And what did Stefanski get for promoting his soul? Bupkis! Nada! Jack shit! No person’s ever made a take care of the satan that yielded so little. At the least Robert Johnson realized to play the guitar. How is Stefanski speculated to impress his new buddies in hell when he lastly will get there? Brag about his .446 profession successful proportion and clarify how inside zone works?
Your quarterback: Maintain on, I must examine which one is at the moment alive.
Having lastly gotten themselves out of the self-imposed quarterback controversy of the Cousins/Penix. period, the Falcons determined to run it again by signing Tua Tagovailoa within the offseason. Tagovailoa is now formally dangerous sufficient to start out the second section of his profession as a everlasting backup, however the Falcons are one of many few groups within the league on which he might count on to be the common starter. This makes him the right man to signal in case your aim is confuse everybody, the gamers included, about what route the franchise is meant to be stepping into.
I suppose you might interpret Tagovailoa’s signing as damage insurance coverage for Penix, who nearly definitely will not be able to play in Week 1 after tearing his ACL final November. In the event you assume that is a sound technique, you are most likely additionally an enormous believer within the “good man with a gun” principle of lowering gun violence.
Lets run by way of the damage historical past for these two, who at this level are extra suited to work as consultants on The Pitt than they’re for enjoying quarterback? Tagovailoa completed his faculty profession by getting concussed and dislocating his hip on the identical play, and he is now been concussed not less than 4 occasions since coming into the NFL. No person’s been this prone to die in a soccer sport for the reason that boys at Yale and Harvard had been enjoying with out helmets and tackling one another into the uncovered boulders that dotted their filth fields.
Penix’s laundry record of accidents could also be much less prone to produce a grim headline in 2035, nevertheless it’s simply as damaging to his possibilities at staying on the sector. Courting again to school, he has suffered 5 season-ending accidents in his final eight seasons as a quarterback. Between tearing his ACL twice in his proper knee and as soon as in his left, he is managed to sprinkle in a fractured clavicle and a sprained AC joint. At this level, Penix’s surgeons do not even want to make use of scalpels; they only go at him with a pair of forks like they’re on the point of serve pulled pork.
So I suppose the plan is to play Tagovailoa for as many video games because the cloudy spots on his mind will permit, after which chuck him into the incinerator simply in time for Penix to get again on the market and tear a ligament no person’s ever heard of earlier than. In the event you wheeled both of those guys into Dr. Frankenstein’s laboratory, he’d be like, “Cease bringing me duds. I would like recent cadavers solely.”
What’s new that sucks: In the event you’re the type of one who will get fired up by your workforce spending the offseason signing mediocre gamers to low cost, one-year offers, then it is best to develop into a Falcons fan. The record of scrap that is been tossed onto this roster is lengthy and consists of TE Austin Hooper, DE Cameron Thomas, DT Da’Shawn Hand, LB Channing Tindall, LB Azeez Ojulari, C Corey Levin, and DE Samson Ebukam. The closest the Falcons got here to splashing large cash this offseason was signing WR Jahan Dotson to a three-year deal and giving multi-year offers to P Jake Bailey and 41-year-old Okay Nick People.
The Falcons’ protection is meant to be constructed across the ferocious pass-rushing talents of their two 2025 first-round picks, edge-rushers James Pearce Jr. and Jalon Walker. Effectively, Walker is now out for the season after tearing his ACL in coaching camp, and Pearce Jr. might be going to get suspended for allegedly attempting to kill Rickea Jackson along with his automotive.
What has all the time sucked: Oh my god, Kyle Pitts continues to be right here? Falcons followers lived by way of 4 seasons of this man making them really feel like absolute morons for ever believing {that a} 6-foot-6 top-five decide who runs sooner than most vast receivers might be good at tight finish, after which in his fifth 12 months with the workforce they had been pressured to persuade themselves that 928 receiving yards and 5 touchdowns was him changing into good.
You’d assume after 5 seasons of getting teased by this man, the Falcons’ entrance workplace would have been keen to maneuver on after his contract ran down on the finish of final season, however as a substitute they signed Pitts to a brand new three-year take care of $36 million in ensures. When Pitts places the ending touches on a 600-yard, three-touchdown season, you fools can have no person responsible however yourselves.
Atlanta formally surrendered its standing as a worthwhile metropolis when it allowed Luke Kornet to bully the Hawks out of getting Magic Metropolis night time.
Killer Mike has reached the “riffing with RFK Jr. and pitching him concepts about baby assist” stage of his profession. It is downhill from right here.
There’s nothing worse than a white man from Atlanta. He is both a racist who solely roots for the Braves and performs golf 4 occasions per week, or a man who cannot go 5 minutes with out reminding everybody that he’s accustomed to the Dungeon Household. Each of you’ll want to give it a relaxation.
What won’t suck: RB Bijan Robinson is genuinely nice, and Stefanski can scheme up a potent operating assault when he has the suitable personnel. Robinson will run for two,000 yards and the workforce will nonetheless end with eight wins.
HEAR IT FROM FALCONS FANS!
William:
One of the best Falcons transfer ever made within the off season was when Lisa Left Eye Lopes burned down Andre Rison’s mansion. It was breaking information in Atlanta, and actually essentially the most thrilling Falcons reminiscence from my childhood. If I’d prefer to be nostalgic for that childhood, I can purchase a Falcons throwback jersey. There’s solely two to ever select from: Deion Sanders and Michael Vick.
Aeden:
If we performed each sport on Monday night time we would’ve received the tremendous bowl. It jogs my memory how a lot I hate this workforce. We really had a cross rush for the primary time in eternally and it seems JPJ loves practising at house on his girlfriend.
Thank god these ugly ass jerseys died with that regime. However all this offseason has simply been Matt Ryan propaganda to cowl up how shitty it has been. Wow what an improve at QB, Tua bought hit so laborious the holier than thou man threw up gang indicators (though I am certain folks in our fanbase thinks Penix does).
Final month I had a pal from highschool name me out of the blue who I have never heard from in 5 years. Very first thing out of his mouth was “28-3”. It by no means feels any higher. There are children in sweatshops who assume being a falcons fan is the worst factor potential.
Andrew:
Ah, my beloved Failcons. This workforce is all the time someplace between average-as-grits, and utterly and completely fucking moribund. Will *THIS* be the 12 months we break the seemingly insurmountable NINE-WHOLE-ASS-WIN barrier? In fact not. The roster continues to be a dumpster hearth because of the earlier regime, (why NOT signal Kirk Cousins to a cap-crippling contract solely to show round and draft a fragile 37 12 months outdated QB who’s knees shred should you have a look at them sideways?), we gave away this years 1st spherical draft decide to a man with some SERIOUS anger administration points, and our prized draft decide from this 12 months is an undersized slot receiver who will get floor into the turf by week 7.
A lot as I like Arthur Clean for being one of many few seemingly respectable house owners in sports activities, he must have much less endurance along with his incompetent hires. At the least our stadium expertise does not suck OR price a fucking fortune (LOOKING AT YOU, JURRAH!).
Doug:
Although it’s been nearly a decade for the reason that Tremendous Bowl LI disaster, I do know this installment of WYTS continues to be going to be peppered with “28–3” jokes. That used to bug me, till I noticed: What else is there to say about us? The Falcons are, and traditionally have been, such a nondescript mediocrity that there’s actually nothing else for anybody to affiliate the franchise with. The consensus most embarrassing collapse in NFL historical past and it’s most likely the one factor holding us from being the workforce everybody all the time forgets in Sporcle’s “Can You Title All of the Nationwide Soccer League Groups?” quiz.
The worst half, although? 28–3 was our excessive level! By any goal measure, these had been the Falcons’ golden days! What I wouldn’t give to look at this workforce blow a sport with precise stakes once more! As a substitute we’re choking away regular-season snoozers to groups just like the Saints and Panthers, video games with zero significance past figuring out who finishes DFL within the worst division within the league. Successful the busted-ass NFC South is like having the largest dick in kindergarten, and we will’t even handle that.
Fuck me, fuck Tom Brady (nonetheless), triple-fuck Terry Fontenot, and fuck Kirk Cousins with a vaccination needle the girth of a Delta widebody. All that mentioned, Drew, fuck your pissing and moaning about Atlanta, too. Oh, boo-hoo, we served you your sandwich 15 seconds later than your high-strung Yankee ass would’ve most popular? Keep mad about it. And bless your coronary heart.
Kyle:
Final 12 months, I purchased tickets to see the Falcons as they had been enjoying the Jets on the town. On my birthday, I had the privilege and alternative of taking my girlfriend to see the workforce now led by Kirk Cousins as soon as once more. Because the man they drafted with a historical past of knee accidents surprisingly suffered one other knee damage, what did they do? They completely pissed themselves versus Tyrod Taylor within the freezing rain, with even Jets followers giving me seems to be of pity.
After the Jets kicked the game-winning subject aim, all I might say to my pretty girlfriend, who sat by way of this, was, “Effectively, not less than it’s not the worst loss this 12 months.”
Fuck Arthur Clean and the House Depot he crawled out of.
Brent:
Any time a workforce blows an enormous lead — the San Antonio Spurs in Sport 4 of the NBA Finals, Egypt vs. Argentina within the World Cup — somebody all the time mentions the Atlanta Falcons. And it might even be an excellent larger margin — the Spurs had been up by 30 factors! Egypt was up 2-0 and misplaced, HERE IN ATLANTA — but somebody will all the time go “28-3!”
Holly:
The 28-3 sport is the one time this workforce has been related within the final 30 years. That sport made my dad cry. I do not know why i nonetheless watch them.
Travis:
Ten 12 months anniversary of 28-3 approaches. Will probably be the one supply of pleasure Saints followers get this season. We can have no pleasure in any respect and I am already exhausted. Fuck this workforce and fuck me particularly for eager to nonetheless care. Fool.
David:
Bijan is the good participant we’ve had since Vick fought canines. In fact he’s a Jesus freak that makes Russell Wilson blush and he desires to be an actor after soccer. Along with his Texas ties I can image his Yellowstone spinoff already. Now that he’s bought the bag, I want we’d commerce him simply so he can take pleasure in some success earlier than his physique is half-broken and he’s caught studying Taylor Sheridan traces in nowhere Montana.
Fuck Arthur Smith with Kyle Shanahan’s wrecked Tesla.
David:
This QB room is such a catastrophe that Stetson Bennett can be a legit improve.
Jason:
The Falcons caught strays on social media instantly following the Spurs blowing a 29-point lead towards the Knicks on this 12 months’s NBA Finals, which is extra consideration than they garner throughout NFL season, and albeit greater than they deserve at any time. The one occasions the Falcons generate an iota of curiosity are:
· When another hapless workforce blows the type of lead that makes win likelihood charts seem like the inventory market in 1929, drawing the inevitable comparisons to 28-3
· The primary spherical of the NFL draft, when the workforce is on the clock and everybody else huddles round just like the Simpsons meme with Homer on the console, gleefully anticipating the funniest and stupidest shit you’ve ever seen from an NFL entrance workplace
· These annual WYTS previews themselves, when Drew and the Defector commentariat put aside their authorized briefs and drug habits simply lengthy sufficient to half-heartedly dunk on them after which go about their enterprise
No different Falcons fan will EVER admit this, however the painful reality is that, as a lot as we despise the Saints and their followers (and we do, FTS), the Saints being the upper profile and extra profitable franchise elevates our profile and offers the Falcons the slightest bit extra cachet simply by advantage of the rivalry. Our hated rivals are higher for our model than something the workforce manages to “obtain” by itself.
The Cincinnati Bearcats have extra postseason appearances in Atlanta’s Mercedes-Benz Stadium than the Falcons do. The stadium has been house to the Falcons since 2017.The Atlanta Falcons: aspire to mediocrity, accept notoriety.
Joshua:
I turned a Falcons fan as a result of I grew up about 4 hours north of town. That was my closest workforce, and I simply blindly thought I needs to be their fan since I might need an opportunity to go watch them within the stadium someday. As a little bit boy, I can keep in mind the incessant 4-12 seasons. How we dreamed of an elusive fifth win!
Anyway, the very first time I used to be capable of go see them in particular person, my mother and father took me to their 1986 sport towards the 0-13 Colts. 0-13! Atlanta led all the sport till a blocked punt was returned for a landing within the dying minutes.That’s Falcons fandom in a nutshell. Do not discuss to me concerning the Tremendous Bowl meltdown. I completely noticed it coming.
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